In the end.
The Start of Everything. Devotion. People. Trust. Struggle. Failures (or victories?). What a shame.
(LI – Part 5th)
Count all ‘sometimes’. What is this number connected with, in many cultures…? Yes, luck. Wish You luck. Sometimes, anytime, all time.
It starts with one thing. As everything. Everything has its own beginning, its own reasons to exist, its own genesis. At this moment people aren’t able to receive it, why is Everything happening, why one thing is itself, and the other is something different. As we are intelligent beings, we look for the answers (and maybe we’re too intelligent to understand them?) – what is time, what is space, what is destination…? We all believe, we’ve got control over our lives. We often don’t want to know, that something’s not controlled by us. And that’s the answer for a question ‘what is destination’ – here you are…
Some people are happy, some are covered by sorrow, although they’ve got power of will, they think positive…so maybe it doesn’t matter, how hard we try, and even, do we try…? Failures come, they’ve got power, gained from us, inside…even bigger than successes…
Remember, that’s important…everything happens in due time and everything has its due time.
Time never comes back, time never looks back, never returns, never changes – only in the Presence. But sometimes we lose the sense of Presence and…then everything’s collapsing, everything’s turning into ash – because everything we really HAVE GOT is Presence and wasting chances, wasting time makes in burn, makes it fall. Presence is the only real, truly thing in the world, in the timespace, in Everywhere; because Past is forgettable and Future – changeable. That’s the reason, looking at the question of escaping time, of countdowns, of looking at the watch…becomes looking at something unreal, because of ripping things, which are seemingly attached.
We don’t look in the Past…and then, some day we realize, that time is running and we’re standing in the same place. Frightening feeling and question: ‘how much have we lost?’
Time is uncountable (fortunately? unfortunately?).
Sometimes we just watch, how unpleasant things come, happen, and go away with no apologies. Unable to do anything. What a shame. We keep the pain inside. It stucks us, block us. And, that’s the reason, we eventually fail… Sometimes we’re just helpless… Weak. Because of it, our efforts are wasting, everything’s falling apart. Even, if it means so much for us, it becomes past and…is laid to forget. Just a memory. Memory of the times, when we tried to try, when we got further than before…but, we’ve made a circle. Or, we’ve just walked a short distance, but on a difficult road; we’ve got to a point, but in the hardest way.
In the end…it doesn’t matter. Only the thing, that we’ve come there, counts.
Everyone comes to the end of the life, but everyone in the other way. Look – in view of the end, everything’s just losing its importance. Our failures, and, that we’ve put ourselves together, after them; our losses, refusing ourselves for our pleads…
It doesn’t even matter only the end, only the final result counts.
Just like in relationships. We meet so many people every day…but, sometimes, somewhere appears the spark…the spark, which approaches us to each other. Beginnings are different…and goodbyes are always difficult – as with friends, as with lovers, as with enemies. In the end, in the farewell…this all rest doesn’t matter…
Sometimes we try hard, even, if the others don’t appreciate it, don’t even notice it…in spite of the way they treat us, like things, not like men, we try to forgive, we devote all ourselves…regret for all our ‘bad’ behaviors, unsuccessful actions, and finally, maybe, that we’re breathing too much?!
Reminding about past, sometimes we’re shocked, how has it happened, that we’ve gotten to a point, we’re currently standing in. Everything’s changing. So fast…
Sometimes the best way to forget somebody is to stop recognizing him. Just like he doesn’t exist, just like he’s not alive. That’s cruel. It’s just a…shame, people can’t live in peace. How can we describe it in a different way? Honestly speaking, we can’t, because all these words would mean the same. It’s sad. And unfair. Using so common, easy words makes it, maybe, comprehensive…gives the words their meanings back. And, that’s the common problem, isn’t it?
Every bad thought, every bad action, comes back to us, every harm, we’ve done to somebody, hurts us…even worse, that the wounds, we’ve received from others. Although, when we’ve got so much injures like that, we don’t even feel, when we hurt somebody…
But in the end, it doesn’t even matter.
We put all our trust in somebody, there’s nothing left for us. That’s the ultimate move – but what to do, when we don’t have any other solutions to choose; it pushes us so far, we can’t go further, because there’s only nothingness… So we all have to be conscious, what do we do – what do we do to ourselves, and to the others…when there’s no trust left, and we have to give it to somebody…
Walking on a dangerous ground…
But in the end, it doesn’t matter.
Does it?
