Journal 3/28
Wed, March 28, 2018 at 9:18 PMMartha Mendus
Martha Mendus

It has been some time since my last post on this page. I had been planning weekly writings, in hopes to continue them for a while for writing practice and just to share with the LPU community. These efforts lasted only weeks... and it bothered me.

I have recently been taking on a bit too much responsibility, pushing myself to see how far I could really go, what I could do with all of my time.

So, I bought a planner and then I got really committed. I was working or at school every day, exercising, practicing music and writing... all until Spring Break. 

It started as I procrastinated on class work. Then I skipped the gym regularly, didn't practice music at all and slowly but surely wasted my week... then let that lapse into another week.

This behavior continued until realized how deep I had buried myself in my entire workload. I felt bad about myself... lazy, unprofessional, untalented, academically and intellectually stagnant. I sat at my laptop screen and just stared at it some nights. 

I really think this was because I have not taken time to fully understand and appreciate what it is that I accomplish, create, and learn on a daily basis. Realize that on some level (my friends say), I needed to take a break.

I don't take time to reflect on myself. 

It's a process, surely. It will take time to integrate this all but I think it is possible. 

To stay busy, stay happy, and stay committed.

In short:

Just a reminder that we should all reflect on ourselves, take time to remember our values.